This was a different kind of book for me, so maybe that's why I'm a bit hesitant to review this. It was...weird. The writing was beautiful, yes, and the story was captivating! But there was something slightly off about it. Sometimes we were info dumped with backstory, and sometimes we were told very little. And instead of loving the suspense, it sort of frustrated me because...well, it was obvious. But Carey was just oblivious to what was sitting in front of her, and she doesn't really realize it till the end.
The romance also bothered me a bit because of the fact that she was technically 14 and the guy was 17. I'm not sure why that's a problem, since some of my favorite couples have larger age differences, but 14's always been that in-between number. It could be MG or YA, so it just felt weird. But what she'd been through was absolutely horrifying and made me want to cry or gasp in horror.
I adored some of these characters and I definitely could acknowledge Murdoch's capability of writing the perfect school antagonist! Oh she was one giant...bee. And the perfect mean girl to push Carey along! I couldn't really connect to Carey though because I have a issue with dropping g's in narration. I don't know. It added to the story, but it made me a bit uncomfortable. I loved Nessa, and Ryan seemed to be pretty sweet! I wish we saw some more of her school friends, though. They seemed like they could have some amazing characterization, but their brief scenes ended up making them a but flat in my opinion.
The pacing felt perfect for this novel and I adored the plot, though not many things really came as a surprise. There were many subplots, mainly including the relationships between each character, and I was a bit disappointed that most all of them ended with a Happy Ever After.
If You Find Me is a heartbreaking story that made you realize that the world isn't as perfect as we hope. It's a gritty, beautifully told story that can make you see the world in a different way. And, using a cliche, it'll make us thankful for what we have. And what we don't.